Welcome to the Hickstionary, a landing spot for all things H family.
I'm Heidi. He's Rusty. And together we have our beautiful babe, Beckett and a furry menace, Dakota.
I mostly use this space to brag about how awesome the kid is, whine about how naughty the dog is & share an occasional deep thought.
Thanks for hanging out with us as we figure out this [blessed] life!

If you are looking for my photography blog (where words don't tend to fall out of my mouth nearly as freely), visit {captured by} heidi.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014


I'm not sure there's a perfect balance of work/life once you become a mom. There's no special formula and definitely not just one answer. I LOVE staying home with B but hate working till midnight once he goes to sleep. I am so thankful for the flexible work schedule I have and know I have it pretty good, but I'm not sure it will ever feel 'perfect.' It's kind of like a baby's (and toddler's for that matter!) schedule... as soon as you get them figured out, they've moved on to something else to switch things up on you. I have a feeling my work schedule will continue to evolve as B grows and our needs change.

That said- we have a pretty great set up right now. As he started napping less and less through the summer, it became apparent I was going to need a chunk of time other than bedtime that I could get some work done. After a lot of consideration, we decided to put B in daycare one morning a week. He goes Wednesday mornings till 1pm and it's a great time for him. He plays with other kids, follows someone else's schedule, has to obey another adult, eats lunch with his peers, and just has a great time. He gives me a play by play of what goes on and he's always excited to go back.

I wasn't sure how it would go over..... the first week I asked him if he had fun. He wouldn't answer me in front of his teacher but as we got home and I asked him again he said, 'yeah.... but I just really missed you mommy!!' He gave me a hug I thought would last forever as the tears welled up in his eyes. My mama heart was pretty sad for him. His daddy told us we were both softies and to suck it up. ;) The next week after we got home I asked him again if he had fun. This time he said, 'Oh yeah!!!!' I asked if he missed me, his response- 'NOOOPE!' Oh how quickly they grow up. :)

Overall it's been a great addition to his schedule and he's doing well there.

Things are going great here on Wednesday mornings as well. ;)

I'm able to get caught up on some editing and am hoping that this winter as work slows down I'll be able to actually stay caught up on emails and keeping our house clean. (Emphasis on the 'hoping.') I typically play a sermon from Elevation Church in the background (which I'm not able to otherwise when I'm editing because there's always someone around vying for my attention) or (if we're being real here) the previous night's episode of 'Dance Mom's.' My sessions this week were rescheduled due to the rain (darn rain) and I even had time to sneak in a non-interrupted shower (and this blog post) today.

Yes, I totally love being home with B and I am SO thankful for my work schedule that allows me to do so, but this is a nice change for our family too. B is thriving and growing and his mama is trying to grow along side him.

Please don't talk to me about kindergarten.

Thursday, August 28, 2014

MIA. Again.

Someone (full disclosure: it was my husband) asked why I'd been MIA on social media (Instagram) lately. I didn't really have a great answer. But I had a lot of excuses.

I've been trying really hard (and not so hard on other days) to ditch the phone as much as possible. Those phone ditched moments are usually when the goodness happens that I would otherwise be instagramming.

Summer was emotionally and physically draining. Mostly in a good way (vacation, splash parks, mountain top God experiences) but still draining. The thought of logging on and processing other people's experiences on top of my own was more than I could handle most days.

The resident two year old prefers running around in non Instagram appropriate attire most of the time. When I say non appropriate I mean they would shut down the account and  lock me out. As the kid told his grandma on the phone recently, he 'just really likes bein nakey.'

And  one of the biggest reasons.... It's the busy season for photography. I may not see you again till November.  Unless you have a session scheduled. ;)

In other news. I did post an IG pic today.

I'm semi caught up on editing and requested a date night to celebrate. It's church night so our babysitters were all busy which meant  little man got to tag along with us. We worked more on the napkin in the lap and using good table manners. He even started eating his pasta by twirling it onto the fork tonight. Watching the fork twirling and hearing him say things like, 'actually I want the orange wedges please' and I'm having flash forwards (is that a thing?) to him as an actual little man  out at a restaurant without his mama and that's too much for me to think about.

Saturday, August 2, 2014

beach life

In case you missed my over gramming all week.... we spent the week at Lake Michigan. First in Chicago, followed by a pit stop at Indiana Dunes and ending in Michigan at the ocean (I mean lake).

If you ask B his favorite part of vacation he will tell you 'driving the firetruck' (thanks Chicago FD) and 'the racer car drive' (thanks fast taxi cab dude). R will just tell you 'Chicago' (he totally feeds off the energy of the city) and I'd tell you the beach (because, duh).

First off- how have I lived 5 1/2 hours from this place and never known about it?! It seriously feels like being at the ocean. The sand is amazing, the dunes are gorgeous and the waves are so peaceful. I'd love to spend all of my summers there. :)

Second- I have a ton of work to catch up on but I'm letting myself edit one vacation picture for every 25 work pictures.... clearly I haven't gotten very far yet. ;)

Hopefully I'll be back with a proper vacation update soon. It was a great week!

Saturday, July 26, 2014


June was a rough month. With reminders around every corner of what wasn't going to be, it was not an easy month to get through. But July brought healing. Reminders of miracles and reasons to trust from a God that loves me. This particular night (pictured below) was a huge part of that healing. The healing didn't come from the lantern but in a little boy earnestly closing his eyes and asking Jesus to let him see His face. The healing didn't come from the images taken that night but from the nearness of God and grace He pours out on us. I had no intention of ever sharing these images but they are such a strong reminder of God's grace, love and faithfulness that I thought them too good not to share. Life will never be perfect this side of heaven but God's grace and love for us is never-ending and we can trust in that.

(Thank you to my lovely friend Sara at Like a Fox Photography for joining us and capturing these special images.)

Sunday, July 6, 2014

hello, des moines!

I had to head downtown for some shots for a little project and I drug my boys along. Since I was taking my camera anyway, I finally took some shots of my boys. Unfortunately, B prefers my cell phone camera. To see him really ham it up, check him out on instagram. :) 

Don't mind the shorts change on B (we thought he peed his pants in the car; as it turns out he actually just poured all his water bottle into his lap and whined about being thirsty until we made it to our next stop). (Also, somewhat unrelated but completely mortifying..... we stopped for a sandwich while on our little adventure. When I was walking in I noticed a lady sitting outside on the curb with several (not shopping) bags of 'stuff.' I said, 'are you hungry ma'am? would you like to grab a sandwich with us?' to which HE responded, 'I'm waiting for my wife.' I'm not sure what was more mortifying.... thinking he was homeless or thinking he was a she. You can officially be embarrassed to be seen in public with me now. I was (am) completely mortified over the deal and probably wont ever offer to help another stranger again. Rusty on the other hand got a great laugh out of the deal.) (In my defense... who sits outside to wait when it's 100+ degrees out?!?) Oy. 

Monday, June 30, 2014

Beck's Big Boy Room

Once upon a time there was a little boy. He decided he wasn't real crazy about his crib anymore and that boycotting naps was awesome. His mommy and daddy, deliriously tired from the no sleep, decided it'd be a great time to transition him to the big boy bed. The original plan* was to use the crib conversion kit to switch his crib into a toddler bed and to leave mostly everything else in his not so babyish nursery the same.

If you know me in real life, feel free to start laughing now.

Because you know that's not how it went down.

I took these pictures of B and knew I wanted to hang them in his room somehow. Then I had this faux brick walling sitting around that's supposed to go in the studio and craft room... it hasn't made it that far yet so I stole a smidge and we (I mean, R), hung it up in B's room. Once those two elements were in the trim totally had to go so we went with a dark grey (hopefully to last him till he moves out?) and took down all the existing artwork. (It worked out great cause I used it all in other areas of our house. Hello cute mantel.) We hung up a huge wall map (though I really want a 'physical style' one instead... anyone have one laying around?!). And he got his globe back in his room. It was then we realized we kind of had a travel(ish) meets history classroom theme going on. We ditched the idea of hanging the flag above his bed. R spent an entire day building a pallet bed before I realized there was not enough sanding on the world that would make a pallet bed smooth enough for a toddler and I made an impulse purchase of a twin on amazon. (I don't feel too bad about it, it's the first piece of furniture we've bought for B and only the 4th piece of furniture we've purchased ourselves. Ever.) The bed made me realize how much floor space his dresser takes up. We would love to reuse the dresser in a nursery again someday so we went ahead and purchased a new chest of drawers instead (5th piece of furniture now) and that freed up some floor space. Without the navy of the dresser, we needed to tie in the navy in the pouf so we spray painted the bench daddy made and the 'book shelves' (ikea spice racks) on the walls. I still wasn't satisfied so we swapped out the old ikea curtains for new ikea curtains and called it good. Until I realized the space above his bed was still a blank canvas. I'm super weird about hanging anything heavy or glass above the bed (because what if there's an earthquake?!) (just kidding), so we stuck vintage postcards of all the places he's visited there instead. Full disclosure: he only visited Jamaica in utero and Detroit and Denver were both just airport stops. But he's two and needed a little help filling up wall space so we are totally counting them. (We're also hoping to add a few new postcards to the wall later this summer!) With that, B picked out some finishing accessories. He added in some favorite toys (the van was his first 'souvenir' purchase picked out by himself- he bought it at the Denver airport). He even picked out the Pepsi crate for his nightstand (oh yeah- another impulse furniture buy... that's 6). The lamp was a 1st birthday gift from his Uncle Doyle (I think the box said 'as seen on tv'), the quilt made my some of his great grandparents before he was born, and all the other details are just random finds from around the house. Including my big white comforter he likes to drag in to his room for nap time that I was trying to shoot around to get these shots. :)

I'm contemplating putting another one of his 'book shelves' near the pouf to make a mini reading nook? And adding a rug like this to the space. And switching out the maps. And hanging the airplane from the mobile hook. And of course adding more postcards. But otherwise, we're doneso. Finally. Also, I realize it seems like we did a ton more than just switch out the bed but at least we didn't paint. You're welcome, hunny. ;)

Friday, June 20, 2014

thats what b said v.june14

B: 'I wanna go outside!'
Mom: 'We can't go outside, you'll get your clothes all wet.'
(Several minutes later to a very naked little boy trying to get out the front door) Mom: 'B, why are you standing at the door with your clothes off?'
B: 'Me go outside, me no get my clothes all wet.'

Mom: 'No, you may not use the scissors that way. We use them on paper.'
B: 'But I just want to cut some fingers off!!!'

(using his new norwex towel): 'Oh this is very nice, thank you mama.'

(noticing the new curtain in his room): 'Where did that come from!?!' (to the rest of his new room) 'Oh this is nice!'

(after his first nap in his big boy bed): 'I CAN'T WAIT to go to sleep in my big boy bed tonight!!'

(to almost anything we say): 'Oh, thats right!'

Other things he frequently says:

'Excuse me.'
'Excuuuuuse you.'
'Bless you!'
'Thank you SO much.'
'I want to hold you.' (when he wants you to carry him)
'Put down me.' (when he doesn't want you to carry him)
'I want my daddy!!' (when he's in trouble and daddy isn't home- probably my least favorite thing he's saying these days!)

'Juice store' (for Caseys)
'Pizza store' (also for Caseys)
'Fruit snack store' (for Dollar General)
'Toy store' (for Target)
'Kitty store' (for petco)

'You want me to smile?' (when I try to take his picture)

Wednesday, June 18, 2014

Cooking with B | smoothies

B's daddy would probably prefer he be making 'how to basketball' videos like he used to but since B spends a lot of his time with his mama and a lot of that time is spent in the kitchen, this is what he's up to instead....

Another 'how to' 'in the kitchen with b' special... this time it's his favorite.. SMOOTHIES!!!  He literally has the recipe memorized and can get all the ingredients out of the fridge/freezer (as long as the juice isn't too full).

Don't worry about the parts where he's licking the fruit... we never got around to editing that out... ;)
Also I'm not sure what that is at the end when he's trying to say 'ENJOY!' :)

B's Smoothies:

1 medium fresh fruit (usually our bananas but they were frozen this time so we added some extra juice to help with that)
1 C frozen fruit (strawberries in this case)
1 C yogurt
1 C juice
opt: honey

(Try subbing mangos, pineapples, blueberries, whatever!! Add spinach too. So many options and super easy!)

Enjoy! (Is soy?)

Friday, May 30, 2014


Someone I just recently met, read my tag line on my email signature. It's been there so long I've forgotten about it and clearly it's message is lost on me. 

'Be joyful always.'

It's always been one of my favorite scriptures. Mainly cause I tend to favor the short and easy to memorize ones but more importantly because I need the reminder. 

In former stages of life, I was known as 'the smiley one.' People I barely knew would comment about the smile always plastered on my face. It wasn't necessarily that I always felt like smiling but maybe more that I always wanted people to wonder what I was smiling about. ;) But I was smiling anyhow. 

At some point/stage in life, people stopped commenting on the contagious smile and kinda stopped commenting all together. I wasn't the one people gravitated to at a party, rather I felt invisible instead. I couldn't start a new table and wait for it to fill up around me, I had plenty of room to stretch out in the empty seats on either side. Instead of smiling through an awkward conversation or changing the subject of a hurtful one, I've mastered the art of even more awkwardly staring at the ground in silence until someone gets the hint. (I should probably be embarrassed to admit I've done this multiple times lately.)*

Recently my two year old has been obsessed with talking about feelings; mainly he's telling us he's happy all the time. He points out when someone's not (Dakoty sad. Dakoty not happy). The other day he held his fingers to the edges of his smile and told me, 'if you just do this you will be happy!'**

The two year old telling me I needed to get the sourpuss look off my face? 


'Be joyful always.' 

Not just when I feel like it. Not just when things are going my way. Not just when people are being nice to me. 


I really do have a lot to be thankful for but even if I didn't, isn't life and God's love for me more than I deserve anyway? Isn't that something to be joyful about?


Lord, help me to be joyful in all stages and seasons of life; not just the easy ones going my way. Guard my tongue when I feel like grumbling and instead fill my life and words with encouragement and love. And some happy. Amen. 

*No, I'm not in junior high. I just act like it. 

**We think his obsession started with the 'Happy' song. Who wouldn't be happy when listening to that? ;) 

Monday, May 12, 2014

Two. and a half.

In just a few short hours, Mr. B will be two AND A HALF. On one hand, it's nice because when people ask his age and think he's three or nearly three, I can just say 'two and a half' instead of 'he just turned two in November.' On the other hand.. HE'S TWO AND A HALF.

Seriously. How did that happen?

Since his second birthday, the biggest change has been the potty training trick. He rarely ever has accidents (though I know I just jinxed it and he'll have one tomorrow now). And if he knows diaper time (nap or bedtime) is too far away, he'll even ask to use the potty for you know what. (Because apparently he still likes doing that in his diaper.)

His big interests are still anything with wheels (trains, Cars, trucks, tractors, airplanes) and dinosaurs. The dinosaur obsession started when we downloaded (the original) Land Before Time onto his iPad. Since then, Aunt Kerry got him a whole set of LBT movies and they play on repeat.

He loves going on bike rides but this year has decided he only wants to wear a helmet if mom is (good thing I got a cute one!).

He can spot a park a mile away and starts shouting, 'PARK! Park please!!' from the backseat as we drive by. (This may have something to do with the 100 parks in 2014 plan we are trying out. My awesome friend Molly posted that she was doing it with her girls and I knew it'd be right up our alley too. SO fun!)

He's super into 'projects' and spent a lot of time painting and coloring this winter.

He knows his way around an iPad better than either of his parents.

His favorite song is Happy.

He LOVES fruit (grapes, strawberries, bananas, etc, etc) but has decided he's not that into veggies. Even peas (which used to be his fave snack) are no longer requested (and barely tolerated). His most requested food is french fries though. Not cool. His second most requested 'food' is a smoothy. He's a big fan. (Me too.)

His favorite movies are Land Before Time, Cars, Airplanes, Frozen & Toy Story. His favorite shows are Thomas, Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and Paw Patrol. Thankfully though we've been spending as much time outdoors as possible lately and he hasn't watched too much tv this month.

He hasn't had any illness to speak of since his birthday (that I can think of?) (knock on wood) though he did randomly vomit once last month. It was only the third time in his life it had happened (once as a baby and once in the night while he was sleeping) so he was pretty scared and didn't know what was going on but he made sure to say 'excuse me' after he did it. He's seriously the sweetest boy ever (not that I'm biased or anything). ;)

He's turning into a pretty good little friend... most of the time. He has some friends he goes to mom's co-op with on Wednesdays and he talks about them all the time! He can give you directions to all of their houses (which isn't too hard since they are all just a couple blocks away) and will request that you take him there often. He's still a big fan of the neighbor girls and get to hang out with them a lot too. He's still learning how to share but it seems to be less traumatic to have to do it. :)

He's saying more and more hilarious stuff every day........................ And I should probably come up with an example to fill in the blank here with but I guess I'm running low on sleep cause I'm blank. ;)

updated: just the other day, he pulled a chair over to the fridge. When I asked him what he was doing he said, 'cooking.' Me: 'Cooking what?' B: 'Cooking water!' (He was putting his cup up to the water dispenser inside the fridge and helping himself, thus the 'cooking' part.) 

Other fun stuff he's been up to since his 2nd bday: his first sled ride and snowman, his first KC weekend, his first LEGOland visit, his second plane ride to Arizona (he was a ring bearer in his Aunt Mal's wedding), his first official Easter egg hunt, his first tractor ride, more hair cuts, his Uncle Travis' wedding, his first Pella visit, and more.

If you follow us on instagram, you can keep up with more of the fun stuff he's into and for everyone else, I have a plan to take some two and a half year old pictures very soon! Maybe. :)

Happy half birthday, B!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...